The Little Things
May 6, 2015

What does it feel like when someone just sits with you, without distraction, and takes the time to really hear what you’re saying and connect to you in that moment?

The ability to be present with someone, while it can be difficult, is one of the most powerful and meaningful gifts that we can give to someone else. When we choose to slow down in our own lives and connect deeply to their story or their pain (“climb into the hole with them”), we can make a big impact in others’ lives.

Gift of Presence

That’s one of the things I love about being a counselor. For 50 minutes there are two people sitting in a room, face to face, without the distraction of other things to do or technology buzzing away at us. For 50 minutes, I get to the give the gift of someone being present in their lives, their fears, and their pain, and people respond deeply to that. We desire to be known and heard, but that involves someone being present. And being present is hard.

It’s so much easier to distractedly pick up your phone as you’re in conversation with someone and start scrolling through instagram. It’s easy to half pay attention as your children talk about the day. It’s easy to be going through mental check-lists as your significant other talks about a problem at work. It’s hard to be present, but the gift of presence it’s a powerful tool if we choose to use it.

As you go about the next few days, check in with yourself from time to time to see if you’re being present in the conversations going on around you. Notice what is distracting you, and bring yourself back to the present. Choose to give someone else the gift of presence.

Now it’s your turn to share! How do you try to be present in others’ lives?

←

2 responses to “The Gift of Presence”

  1. Abby @ BackAtSquareZero says:
    May 6, 2015 at 6:41 pm

    I try hard to be a good friend who is there for others. I try to be present, but I think technology makes us all worse at that than we were 10 years ago.

    • littlethingscaroline@gmail.com says:
      May 6, 2015 at 8:42 pm

      Technology certainly presents some complications to being present. It’s so automatic (and instantly rewarding) to pull out our phones. When I was in Mexico I mostly stayed off my phone for the 10 days (I was probably on it an average of 5 mins a day) and I loved that!