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Before we start, here are a few fun facts about the incline: The website says that it is one mile in length, although my garmin and fit bit both tracked closer to 1.5 miles. In less than a mile the trail gains about 2,000 feet in elevation, and the trail difficulty is considered to be difficult. You can read more about the incline here.
My brother and I headed into Manitou Springs (just outside of Colorado Springs) on Sunday morning and were shocked at the amount of traffic. We ended up parking in a neighborhood a mile away from the trail head and had to walk up a hill to get there- not ideal to already be out of breath before the true hiking is about to begin. To be honest, this was the second day I was in Colorado, and I had started to develop a bit of a migraine that morning due to the altitude (typical for just adjusting to altitude for me). I had taken migraine medicine about an hour before I left, but by the time we had driven there, parked, and walked to the trail head, my head was pounding. I sat down on the pavement and wondered if I was crazy for trying this with a migraine. I decided to start, knowing that sometimes exercising actually helps my migraine. Then I looked up and saw this:
I mean, that looks insane, right? LOOK AT HOW STEEP IT IS TOWARDS THE TOP. I immediately thought I was absolutely crazy. The stairs were spread out at first, but the end they were much closer and much steeper.
We headed up and by the time I had walked about 30-40 steps I was panting and sweating. I’d say that’s a pretty strong start, right? Another 20 steps in and I began to pass people sitting on the ground. I was worried that I’d be the weakling having to take breaks while everyone else hiked past me, but the elevation and steepness of the hike was no joke, and most people around me were resting quite regularly as they hiked.
The sun beats down on the stairway and there isn’t any shade on the actual stairs, so we were hiking with the sun beating down on us the entire time. I’m so thankful that there are little trees along the way on the side of the path, and we stepped off the stairs from time to time to catch our breath and enjoy a few moments in the shade.
By about 30 minutes in I was stopping every 40-60 steps to catch my breath, and it I wasn’t on top of my breathing it would turn to just panting. I distinctly remember saying to my brother at one point “I need to override what my body wants me to do and try to take long, breaths”. The entire hike felt like one big override of what my body really wanted to do. The other reason I wanted to stop frequently was to enjoy the views. I wasn’t doing this hike for time- it was fun!
And then it got steeper. Because of how steep it was, everyone was bent over a bit, such that you could reach out your hand at points and touch the stair in front of you- crazy to be at such an angle. Some of the stairs felt so steep that I pretty much just climbed up using my hands too, which felt a bit childish but felt safer.
The good news was that my migraine medicine seemed to really kick in at that point so my head wasn’t throbbing, but my heart was beating hard enough that I could hear each pound in my ears. I remember saying “I think my heart might explode”, but I just kept taking it nice and slow.
At one point we sat down to eat some trail mix (I had no appetite at all that afternoon while hiking, which wasn’t great, but I was able to get some calories in me which helped) and I started to drink some nuun! I love the refreshing flavors they have and the electrolytes- it definitely helped to revive me.
This little guy kept sitting close to us which was fun, and he picked up some little pieces of the trail mix we dropped. He obviously wasn’t afraid of humans!
As I was watching people huff and puff as they climbed up the stairs, I wondered what makes people do something that is hard like this. I knew what was bring me up the stairs- the sense of pushing myself, of overcoming, of adventure- they all fueled me. But I wanted to understand what was carrying everyone else up those stairs too.
When we finally got up to the top I had the biggest smile on my face. This was a 9 year goal that I FINALLY was able to complete because I worked slowly on increasing my strength with POTS. It would’ve been easy to let this dream go, but I’m so glad that I didn’t.
(I took pics with my brother too but didn’t include them here since I keep my family members’ names and faces off my blog!)
I mean, look at these views:
You can’t see where we started because it is so far down there!
Sporting my UV Buff– I loved having it with me!
Beautiful, right?
We stayed at the top for about 10 minutes and then decided to hike down the Barr Trail, which runs on the side of the mountain and is more mileage but less steep. It was absolutely gorgeous!
This is the top of the incline
Hiking down the Barr Trail on the side of Pikes Peak
We ended the day with about 6.5 miles of hiking and a wealth of awesome memories. We had a really fantastic time and even in the hardest moments I told my brother that I would absolutely do this again! And it was a day of free entertainment 🙂
I recovered by enjoying a wonderful dinner at our friends’ house, rolling with my addaday roller, and sitting around the fire that evening talking and laughing with them.
The day was truly fantastic and one that will be a great memory from 2015. And mostly I’m proud that someone with POTS was able to work towards being able to hike part of Pikes Peak. I never thought it would be possible.
Make sure to head over there every Tuesday to meet another BibRave Pro member. We’re a fun group of runners 🙂
All Fall Down follows the life of Allison- a woman who seems to have it all: a great job, a wonderful family, and she lives in a huge, beautiful house. Underneath the surface, however, she is deeply struggling with where her life is at. One day, which sitting in the pediatrician’s office, she takes a quiz about prescription drug use, and begins to question her pill use. She believes that taking her pills allows her to manage her life well, but begins to wonder if what she’s doing is actually a problem…
Here are a few quotes that stood out to me:
“You’ve got to make time. It’s important. You know how they tell you on planes, in case of an emergency, the adults should put their oxygen masks on first? You’re not going to be any good to anyone if you’re not taking care of yourself.” <- LOVE THIS! It’s so true.
“Admitting you had a problem was the first step – everyone knew that – but admitting you had a problem also left you open to the possibility that maybe you couldn’t fix it” <-definitely scary!
“The problem was, he’d never told me what he wanted, which meant I never got to think about whether it was what I wanted, too.”
All Fall Down especially appealed to the addictions counselor in me, as it had the theme of prescription pill addiction. I enjoyed watching the process of the addiction playing out in Allison’s life. I think any reader could benefit from some of the lessons that the book holds, and I’d definitely encourage you all to check it out!
If you’re looking for other book suggestions or reviews, check out my book reviews page!
Now it’s your turn to share! What’s one of your favorite summer reads?
A decade ago I spent the summer coming close to passing out every few days. I still hadn’t started my beta blocker, and exercising was absolutely out of the question. I had no idea what was really going on in my body, even though I had my POTS diagnosis for a year at that point. Hiking would’ve absolutely been out of the question.
Nine years ago I lived out in Colorado for the summer. I had a fantastic time, but over the entire course of the summer, I only made it on three hikes, and they were incredibly difficult. I thought every weekend about how fun it would be to climb the incline (I’ll be talking all about the incline tomorrow!), but knew that it would be unsafe with where I was at with my chronic illness.
It was my dream one day to be able to spend time in Colorado and actually hike around the area. This past week this dream finally came through! I spent a week and a half hiking in all sorts of cool places out west, and while I had a great time and marveled about what I was seeing, I also spent time enjoying the fact that I can do something I haven’t been able to do in 10 years.
Part of it is that, of course, I am stronger and in much better shape. It took me multiple years to slowly begin to exercise with POTS and begin to develop strength again. I’ve increased my drive and willingness to push forward even when I don’t feel well. I’ve also learned how to manage my POTS and do things that I know will lead to the highest likelihood of success in being active (i.e. wearing compression sleeves or drinking nuun while working out). Each of these things plays a big role.
The thing with POTS is that each day can be SO different. There are some days (or hours in the day) where I feel like I’ve lost every ounce of energy I have, and ache so badly that it hurts to move. There are other days I can run a half marathon, bike 70 miles, or hike at a crazy elevation.
To most people, this makes no sense. It doesn’t seem possible that these days are unpredictable and so different, but that’s life with POTS. I take the good and keep plowing forward with grace and patience with myself. Having a chronic illness like POTS is a LONG, long journey, and it’s important to celebrate all the little steps along the way. For those of you who have POTS who might be reading, please don’t feel discouraged about where you might be at as you read these posts about hiking or exercise. Know that I didn’t just develop POTS and immediately jump into this. It’s been an almost 12 year process now.
I’m excited to share more about my hikes with you all as I scatter some recaps throughout the next few weeks. Mostly, though, I want to encourage you to look at your own life and look at the progress that you’ve been able to make over the past few years, and use that as encouragement to keep moving forward. I know it can be frustrating to have the desire to do something and not physically be able to do it, but keeping at it and slowly building on your current abilities can grow into something much bigger than you had hoped!
What a difference a decade makes. This past week I hiked with a smile on my face, enjoying nature and enjoying the miracle of my journey. POTS deeply impacts my life on a daily basis, but I continue to try to not let it define me. I’ll take every little moment that I can get and celebrate it as best as I can.
As a counselor especially, I was interested in the story of how their own regrets and traumas informed their parenting, and how that impacted the next generation. That plot line was deeply poignant and wonderfully written. I also loved the plot line that involved the discussion of race and culture, as Lydia’s father is Chinese (but grew up in the US) and her mother is Caucasian American. Lydia and her family live in a very white community, and that deeply impacts her growing up as well. As her parents process her death and begin to dig further into her life, they realize that the Lydia they thought they knew was quite different than the Lydia who actually was.
Here are a few quotes I highlighted as I was reading:
“They never discussed it, but both came to understand it as a promise: he would always make sure there was a place for her. She would always be able to say, Someone is coming. I am not alone.”
“The things that go unsaid are often the things that eat at you–whether because you didn’t get to have your say, or because the other person never got to hear you and really wanted to.”
“You loved so hard and hoped so much and then you ended up with nothing. Children who no longer needed you. A husband who no longer wanted you. Nothing left but you, alone, and empty space.”
“She understands. There is nowhere to go but on. Still, part of her longs to go back”
There were parts of Everything I Never Told You that I wish had gone deeper- sometimes I was left with a feeling of just wanting more. Overall, however, this was a wonderful story with beautiful little quotes and snippets throughout. I gave the book a 4 out of 5 on goodreads, although probably would’ve given it a 3.75/5 if I could have!
For other book reviews or suggestions, check out my book review page.
Now it’s your turn to share! What makes a book good in your opinion? Does it change between genres?
Jackie and I met back in February of 2004, and I’ve loved having her as a friend. I’ve loved getting a front row seat to what the writing process looks like, and it’s been exciting for me to watch her passion for writing come to fruition. A few months ago I published a blog post with a review of Truest (if you missed it, check it out!), and I’ve only grown more excited since reading the book the first time to get my hands on the official copy. Until Truest is published next month!
Here are a few questions that have lingered since I read the novel:
How did you originally come up with the story written in Truest? Was there any inspiration from your life included?
Truest began with the Hart twins—in one hand, I had Laurel’s mental condition; in the other, I had Silas’s personality. Everything started there, even though the story lent itself to being told through Westlin Beck’s eyes. You could say that both of the Hart twins were inspired from my life—I had gone through similar thought patterns as Laurel … and Silas was my seventeen-year-old self’s dream boy!
You included mental health themes throughout the book. What prompted you to do this, and what do you hope your readers take away from this component of the book?
My own life is a storied history of obsessive-compulsive disorder, so mental health awareness and advocacy are close to my heart. They flowed naturally out of who I am and into my book. I am not sure that there’s any one thing that I want readers to take away from this element of Truest, but I do hope that it makes them stop and think about suffering. Sometimes I think the world is moving in the right direction toward compassion, and then sometimes I realize just how far we have to go in understanding the nuances of mental illness.
What character do you most relate to in the book?
I’ve not been asked this before! I relate to each of the main characters in different ways—to Silas as we are both writers, to West as we are both readers. But I especially relate to Laurel, since she and I have each known suffering at the hand of mental illness. We are in a sisterhood of suffering—and of suffering imposed by our own minds. Mental illness is a civil war.
What do you hope your readers will take away in general from the book?
I hope it makes them think deeply—about anything: stories, history, religion, family, and especially about rescue.
Do you have a favorite quote or short passage from the book?
I love Silas and West’s first kiss:
And then he kissed me—soft, sweet, seeking—and there was only room in my thoughts for one boy, this boy: Silas Hart, whose kiss was exploding my heart from a bud into a blossom with such alacrity that I marveled I could be so full without bursting.
Would you ever consider writing a sequel?
Maybe not a sequel, but I would love to explore Mark Whitby’s story a few years down the road. More of a companion novel. I have a rough sketch in my head of what happens to the Green Lake crew in the 4-5 years following the events of Truest. And I know that West’s college roommate ends up being pretty important.
Could you summarize what the writing process was like for you? What were your most and least favorite parts of that process?
Writing is a blessing and a curse. Writers have to have open hearts in order to write—but then we are also supposed to have thick skins when it comes to criticism. It feels like a paradox. What happens for me is that I just feel everything deeply. That means really terrific joy when things are going well and very, very dark lows when things are not. That said, I try to write or edit six days a week. Writing the first draft and perfecting the final draft are the best parts. The hard parts are the hours and hours and hours of in-between work when the goal never seems to be getting any nearer. I remind myself that showing up to do the hard work is always productive and what shows that I’ve matured as a writer. In earlier years, I could never finish anything! Now, it’s all about showing up, day after day (and year after year), and working hard.
In Jackie’s blog, she not only shares more about her writing process and about her upcoming books, but also writes all sorts of fantastic mental health posts! If you’d like to follow Jackie on social media, you can find her the following places:
We still have a few weeks until Truest comes out, but in the meantime, you can read more about the book on Jackie’s blog!
I started my birthday celebrations out when I biked 70 miles last week, but the actual start of my birthday celebrations was August 5th when Meg and I went out to get strawberry shortcake and go for a little walk in the evening.
On my birthday I woke up nice and early and headed out for a 4 mile run. I absolutely cannot believe that this is the 5th year that I’ve gone on a birthday morning run (have I really been running that long now?!), and I love that it’s become a part of my birthday morning tradition!
After running I got ready and headed into town to spend the day with friends! I ate Chick-fil-A for lunch (what could be a better birthday lunch than spicy chicken?), and then headed to a massage.
After the massage I got a coke freeze from speedway (I had a free one so I used it yesterday to get the bigger size! :D) and talked to my college roommate.
Then it was off to the movies! A friend and I went to go see Paper Towns, and it was better than I expected (I read the book this past winter and enjoyed it. You can read my Paper Towns review here). Then it was off to a Mexican restaurant with some friends for dinner! You can’t go wrong with churros!
Then I headed to another friend’s house for the evening where we ate cupcakes and played games until 2 am.
The day was full of so many things that I love- spending time with friends, great food, physical activity, and lots of fun things. The only things I really missed yesterday were going to the pool (it was rainy for a good chunk of the day) and having a fire at night!
I’m ready to tackle this next year of life and can’t wait to see all the surprises along the way.
Birthday picture from last year. That cupcake was delicious.
I’ll do an actual birthday-ish post tomorrow (I typically post my birthday posts on the 7th), so today I’ll stick to some big things I’m thankful for today/this year/from my life:
I’m thankful for the life I’ve been given. There have been some truly beautiful, fantastic memories, and some deeply painful moments in my life, but as a whole I’m deeply thankful for the life that I’ve been given. If it were to all end today, I’d still say that I had a fantastic, beautiful life. I’m thankful for the life I’ve gotten to live so far.
I’m thankful for the last year. I’ve made some wonderful new friends, had some fantastic memories (I PR’d in the half marathon I was running in memory of my grandma, I wrote a chapter for a textbook that was published this year, and I got the chance to see the REAL Cancun when I lead a week long volunteer trip there to name a few!), and loved the work that I got to do. This year of my life was a really beautiful year.
I’m thankful for the people who have loved me well this year. I feel so overwhelmed by the love and support I’ve received in countless ways this year. I feel so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life- family, friends, and co-workers! The fact that I have such close, meaningful relationships with my brothers is one of the greatest joys in my life.
I’m thankful for the modern conveniences I have. Electricity, fresh water, heat/air conditioning, gas for my car, a car, a safe place to live, technology- all things we so easily take for granted, but things that make my life a whole lot more comfortable. I’m thankful for all these little things that I sometimes don’t recognize and appreciate in my life.
I’m thankful for the jobs that I have. The fact that I get to witness deep pain in peoples’ lives and stand alongside them as they process this pain, learn better coping skills, and/or make big behavioral changes in life is utterly amazing to me. I count it another one of the greatest joys in my life to have the opportunity to do what I do.
And because it’s Thursday, here’s a #tbt to my 2nd Birthday:
I loved that bear. And yes- I had a curly blond mop of hair.
Now it’s your turn to share! What are you feeling thankful for today?
It’s 6:45 am, and the sun is streaming through the blinds as I wake up to the blaring sound of my alarm. I roll slowly out of bed, my neck, back, and legs throbbing. I hobble away from the bed, sore, stiff, and a little grumpy, overworked by the combination of moving and setting a new biking personal distance record of 70 miles. I’m just aching a bit. I walk into the living room on my way to make breakfast, and my eyes see this on the floor:
It’s my addaday roller. My plans for breakfast get delayed as I flop on the floor to start rolling out my sore muscles. Sure- it hurts and my muscles yell out in protest as I dig away at them, but I keep going, knowing that rolling will help me feel better later today.
July has been a tough month for my muscles- between moving (lots of heavy lifting, walking, and bending at weird angles to clean), long bike rides, hours on the plane and exploring new cities, and running, my muscles have gotten a serious workout! When Bibrave offered their ambassadors a chance to test out the addaday roller, I jumped at the chance, knowing this would be the best time to put it to the test. To tell you the truth, though, I first started using the addaday roller this past fall while training for the Monumental Half Marathon. Melissa had one, so we’d use it after our runs, and I liked it immediately (and was so excited to have the chance to get one of my own!).
The roller has a series of different balls that act as massage and trigger point options to get into each little muscle.
I’m all about being proactive in my health and trying to do my best to prevent injuries from occurring (or at least immediately working on any little injury flares that I notice!), and the addaday roller not only helps me to feel my best, but helps me to decrease my chances of getting injured. The addaday came at the most ideal time of the year, and I can’t wait to use it as I continue to train for races throughout the year!
That little red trigger ball is idea for the sides of my shin, which is an area that gets tight and cramps easily on me!
For those of you interested in the addaday roller, you can check out some great videos of how to use the product here. You can also find them the following places: Twitter, Instagram, their website, and Facebook.
Now it’s your turn to share! What’s one of your favorite recovery tools?
I made sure to add nuun plus again to my 30 ounce bottle of nuun, which I think made a significant impact on my ride. To be honest, I wasn’t expecting the ride to be great. I’ve been sleep deprived for about 2 weeks now, and I’ve been on my feet a ridiculous number of hours a day, so I wasn’t going in with fresh legs at all.
I finally finished listening to The Help during my last bike ride so I started a new audiobook this ride (The One and Only– it was good at the start but now, about half way through, it’s turning a bit weird), which kept me entertained while riding.
One exciting part of this ride was that the trail wasn’t flooded this week, so I was able to go back to my normal route! It’s crazy to see how much the corn has grown throughout July (I haven’t been up that far on the trail since the end of June now!). The wild flowers were beautiful too, and I tried to deeply soak in the beauty and smells around me. I picture these rides all winter, so I’m trying to be mindful of staying in the present moment as I am riding.
The first 15-20 miles my legs felt heavy, but around the 1.25 hour mark my legs felt like they loosened up a bit and I fell into a good rhythm. By the time I hit 37 miles I started to think that today might be a good day to try to break my personal distance record. My PDR last year was set during my birthday ride, when I biked a metric century, hitting 64 miles. I figured I could easily hit 65 or 66 miles on the ride, but then I realized it was stupid to not just hit 70!
Unfortunately, I hadn’t exactly planned on going that far, and definitely could’ve used some more fuel and fluid since it was so hot. Last week’s detour was actually helpful this week, as I was able to get in more miles by going down that route as well!
There was a nice breeze that was critical for me staying cool while I was riding, but I was still dripping with sweat by a few miles into the ride. Every time I stopped to take a picture or to eat something it felt overwhelmingly hot, and I was even more thankful for that breeze once I started again! I’ve mentioned before that I absolutely love the salted carmel gu flavor (I tried it for the first time last August or September), and while I couldn’t use it as my only source of energy (too sweet!), it gives me the perfect little boost of energy after about two hours of biking.
Hitting 70 miles was HUGE for me, especially since 4 years ago I had no intention of ever biking again. I jumped off the bike with a huge smile on my face, wishing that I had the time to keep biking (I only had an hour to stretch, shower, eat, and head to work!). This ride felt amazingly good, but it shouldn’t have! It was a fun way to close out biking in July and start the celebration of my birthday. It’s great to see that I’m stronger than I was before 🙂
Here’s what I ate on the ride:
Mile 8: 3 shot bloks (cran razz)
Mile 19: 1 honey stinger waffle
Mile 29: 1 salted carmel gu
Mile 40: 3 handfuls of dried craisins
Mile 49: 3 shot bloks
Mile 56: 3 handfuls of dried craisins
Drank: 50 ounces of nuun. 1 water bottle (30 ounces) had nuun plus in it, adding more carbs.
When I got home I immediately grabbed my addaday roller to dig at some of my muscles before I sat in my counseling office. It worked well!
Now It’s your turn to share! What’s one accomplishment you’ve had lately that you’re proud of (it can be little or big- as long as you’re proud- share it!)?
